Monday, 13 December 2010

A simple desultory philippic for the 21st Century

I been Mark Zuckerberged, Evan Williamserd.
I been Steve Job’d, Marc Benioff'd.
I been Bill Gates’d and Micro’d till I'm soft.
I been Julian Assange’d, nearly caught man
Sociable, 'cause I'm net-worker’d.
That hash tag I use, it’s easy to find!

I been Reid Hoffman‘d, LinkedIn-outed.
I been Wiki-leaked and Wiki-pedia’d.
Well, I got all the things I want on eBay.
And I learned the truth from Jimmy Wales,
And Amazon won't sell me health,
So I poke a fiend in the Face-book.

I knew a man, his engine's so small,
He couldn't Google anything at all.
He's not the same as you and me.
He doesn't dig YouTube. He's so uncool that
When you say Amazon, he thinks you're talking about Cat Woman,
Whoever he was.
The man ain't got a PeeCee,
But it's alright, ma,
Everybody must get online.

I been Lary Paged, Sergey Brindled.
Stevie Chen, won't you please come home?
I been hyped, skyped, ain’t been paid, Pal!
Been Janus Friis and Niklas Zennstrom.
I just discovered somebody's tapped my phone.

I lost my harmonica, Pierre.

[With thanks, of course, to Paul Simon for the framework, the concept and the idea!]